Staples: that wasn't so easy

Back in February, I bought a 6-outlet powerstrip from Staples. I didn't really need one, but it looked like a pretty good deal. A dollar off the regular price, so it cost me $4.94 and ...


It came with a $5.00 mail-in rebate.


Pretty good deal, right? Not quite. Now I'm getting hassled.


Household limit exceeded? I bought only one. WTF? I sent an angry letter to the Resubmissions address. Those bastards owe me five bucks!

KitKat????

I recently read a blog-post that referenced a KitKat in a way I had never heard before. So, being the resourceful fellow that I am, I went over to Urban Dictionary to look it up. My goodness, funny how the kids talk these days! (Or more likely, I'm just too uncool to know the contemporary lingo).

So anyway, while over at Urban Dictionary, an ad for a T-shirt store caught my eye. Check it out. Maybe it's just because I'm at work and I'm bored out of my mind, but I think they got some funny and clever stuff! This one is my favorite:

Corned Beef and Cabbage

I am having St. Patrick's Day dinner a day late this year. Corned beef, cabbage, potatoes and carrots. I'm still debating whether or not this is a good idea to try to fix something traditional. The smallest brisket I could find was 3 lbs, so I'll probably be eating leftover St. Patrick's Day dinner for the next several weeks!

Smarties

I found out about a year ago that Nestle has a line of candy called Smarties which are not sold in the US. Apparently, they are some sort of candy-coated chocolate. I once asked a Canadian if they are anything like M&M's, and she said they are similar, same idea, but completely different. I spoke to another Canadian who considers Smarties her favorite form of chocolate in the whole world. That's quite an endorsement! She claims that if it wasn't for Smarties, she would be slender and trim.

I have no idea why Smarties are not sold in the US. In our globalized world, it seems like they ought to be available here. This is an opportunity for someone to make money, and it's not being exploited? How can this be?

For me, this candy is surrounded by mystery and intrigue. How exciting to think that there is a whole other world of confectionary delight, just waiting to be explored! Another form of sweet, delicious, melt-in-your-mouth chocolate! Forbidden to the American mainstream! What could arouse the imagination more than that?

Some day, I will have a chance to taste Smarties for myself. But in the meantime, I have a question for those who have first-hand knowledge about Smarties: What are they like? How would you describe them?

Unsolicited Phone Calls

There are some Bush-haters out there who think George W. Bush cannot do anything right, that he is a complete buffooon, liar, and scoundrel of the lowest order. They think he incapable of doing anything good for the country, and that everything he touches turns into a disaster. Well, for those of you who think this way, you are simply wrong. Before your very eyes, I will prove to you, incontrovertibly, that Bush has indeed accomplished something good: he signed the Do-Not-Call-List legislation into law! Although it exempts survey-groups, charities and political fundraising calls, it has still significantly reduced the number of tele-marketers that disturb me while I'm eating dinner. So you Bush-bashers are just wrong. Amidst the smoldering ruins of our democracy, it can be said, truthfully, that Bush has one, single, solitary, positive accomplishment!

A few days ago, I received an unsolicited phone call from a charity. Now don't misunderstand me, I am a very charitable person, and every year, I donate my entire tax refund to a handful of organizations. However, there is no way someone who disturbs me at home asking for my money is going to get even a single cent from me! So last week I got a call from some police organization. I have received calls from this group before, and they are quite interesting, because one of their tactics is intimidation. In the past, when I declined the invitation to donate, the gruff-sounding voice became indignant, almost threatening, asking "You mean you can't even spare ten dollars?" His continued solicitations sounded more and more angry as I continued to refuse, until finally, he huffed and puffed, and snarled through gritted teeth, "Well have a good night!"

I tried not to seem so disagreeable this time. After all, it's not a good idea to alienate the police. So I pleaded my own (false) charity case:

Him: Do you think you can help us with a donation of $35?

Me: Awwww, man, it sounds like a good cause, and I'd like to help you, but I'm kinda strapped right now.

Him: I understand, sir. Perhaps $20 would be easier for you.

Me: I just got laid off a few months ago, and I got mortgage payments, and car payments--I'm really up the creek right now!

Him: Okay, maybe only $10--

Me: (Cutting him off) You don't understand, I'm missing my payments!

Him: Okay, sir, have a good night.

I don't know how convincing I was. But the saddest part is that my story of economic hardship is not all that implausible.